"Hey, fuggeddabout it!"

        Well this is awkward.  I haven't posted anything for over two weeks.  First, let me get you up to speed.

I'm not sure which is the more awkward feature in this picture: my neck or the Honey Buckets.

        I definitely almost died [again] on my way to work on Monday.  This was after we had to deplane just seconds prior to take off, and they actually told us this, "Well, there's a light on in the cockpit, and we have tried to reboot the system three times, but it's still on.  So, unfortunately we're going to have to ask everyone to deplane."  What the-.  Okay, don't tell me that!  Just make some shit up.  At least say the light just came on, not that you've been ignoring it for the last 15 minutes before we, you know, FLY.  Ding dongs.

        Also there was turbulence- which I hate.  I panicked, of course, and started sweating, so I had to turn the little air vent on full blast.  The lady next to me was giving me the evil eye, and I wanted to say, "It's this, or I puke all over your business casual. PS - nylons are so 1996 right now."  Same thing on the way home with the turbulence.  Son of a brick!  The worst part is they didn't have beverage service because of it, so I thought I was going to die totally sober.  

I should probably just wear a helmet at all times

        Now for the real reason I haven't been blogging: Tony Soprano.  Eric and my new obsession is "The Sopranos," and naturally I have started talking like I am in the organized crime business rather than the health care business.  Luckily, I haven't started carrying a gun.  I am far too spazzy to have any kind of concealed weapon.  I would accidentally clip people all the time just because I am a freak.  I have, however, developed a North Jersey accent, started cursing in Italian, eating exorbitant amounts of pasta, and drinking out of wine glasses with gold frosted rims.

         I am not lying when I tell you, I actually said, "Fuggeddabout it," to a patient today.  So yeah, this blogger has been MIA, but let me assure you, I have been narrowly escaping death and saying inappropriate things a minimum of 7 times per day.   Business as usual.

How you doin'?